The following flash fiction is a dark monologue of despair. If you are easily triggered, please do not read on. Thank you.
I am afraid.
I have lost all hope since he left, leaving me with her, and nothing else. How am I going to feed her? How am I going to take care of this precious little girl, when all I have are the pennies in this jar?
I wish to God, that there were answers, that something would break, someone would swoop in here, and rescue me. All I have left is her, and I can not give her what she needs, what she deserves.
Am I a bad mother? What kind of person am I, if I can not care for her like I am supposed to? Is it my fault that he left, should I have done something, anything to make him stay? After all I am depended on him, and she is depended on me. I should have done something, anything to make him stay.
It doesn’t matter what he did to me. It does not matter how much it hurt, or how many bruises I carry as a result. None of that is important.
All that matters is that now, right now I do not know how to feed her.
What am I going to do?
Copyright Claudia H. Blanton 2014